Other Views: Straight talk is a two-way street

The Institute for Private Investors recently conducted a survey of both investors and advisers. The results reminded me of what Billy Joel sang about honesty – “hardly ever heard but mostly what I need.”

I was inspired by the results of the survey to compile these lists. These are things that perhaps should be voiced, but unfortunately neither investor nor adviser seems courageous enough to speak the truth to those who need to hear it the most.

Is the relationship between investor and adviser an irreconcilable one, doomed to dishonesty and disillusionment? Watching successful advisers work with happy investors these past few years has convinced me that honesty is not only the best policy but also the absolute bedrock of every successful relationship.

What investors never tell advisers:

* I wish you would talk less and listen more.

* I can tell when you are nervous and totally uncertain of what you are telling me about the markets or your firm or my portfolio.

* I can sense when your team of professionals is not really a congenial team at all.

* I instantly spot when someone on the team is not well respected by his colleagues; I wonder why you bother bringing this person to the meeting at all, unless it is the boss!

* I heard a terrible rumor about your firm (pick one): Everyone is about to quit, everyone has quit, everyone wants to quit, because of (fill in the blank).

* I can’t understand and don’t much like reading all your reports.

* I would much prefer it if you asked me what questions I have about the markets or my portfolio before we are already in the meeting reviewing my portfolio, so I could think about my answer for more than 30 seconds.

* I worry that your firm seems so intent on accumulating assets; I would prefer that you stay small.

* My friends tell me I am really stupid to have hired you after all the recent news about your firm; I am beginning to wonder myself.

* I don’t like whom you have assigned to work with me, now that you have won me as a new client.

* Funny, I already regret not hiring the other firm I interviewed, but I feel obliged to stick with you, at least for a few months.

* Your performance since we hired you is just terrible, and I can’t believe what awful timing we had in hiring you.

* Why don’t you tell me how much less risk I want to take as my portfolio keeps going down?

What advisers never tell investors:

* I lose sleep, too, when your portfolio is losing money.

* Sometimes, on bad days, I am just as uncertain as you are about the future of the markets.

* I am just as disgusted as you are by the corporate-governance scandals, and if I could, I would fire those in my firm who are involved.

* My boss pressures me to sell you a number of products I don’t really believe in.

* No one really takes enough time to prepare for our meetings with you; we just get too busy, and we end up scrambling to put all the material together.

* I would much prefer to meet with you alone, without so many other professionals or family members present; it seems to restrict the information flow.

* I wish I were not required to use my firm’s back office for the reports we generate for you.

* I am getting really, really tired of working 12-hour days; it hurts both of us.

* I wish I spent more time with my family; a little balance in my life might improve my perspective and my mood.

* My firm expects us all to devote 150% to work; family is not part of the equation. When will that change? Probably not until clients like you complain.

* My paycheck and bonus do not make me your personal concierge, expected to drop everything, including all other clients, to keep you happy.

* I cannot seem to convince you to invest more time in learning about investments, and that limits our success.

* Sometimes I wonder if you really listen to me; do you just hear what you want to hear?

Charlotte B. Beyer is the founder and chief executive of the Institute for Private Investors in New York (memberlink.net).